Beat jokes
Why don't rappers ever gamble?
Because they're always dropping beats, not bets.
Why was the rapper always the life of the party?
Because they knew how to DROP the BEAT!
What did the rapper say to the microphone?
"You better DROP THE BEAT, or I'll drop YOU!"
What did the rapper say to the vegetable?
"Lettuce DROP some BEATS!"
Why did the rapper bring a shovel to the studio?
Because he was digging for those UNDERGROUND BEATS!
Why did the rapper open a bakery?
To make some DOUGH while he dropped his beats!
Why did the rapper become an archaeologist?
Because he wanted to dig for old-school beats!
Why was the rapper always in good shape?
Because he never skipped a beat!
Why did the rapper go to the zoo?
To find some WILD BEATS.
My friend was getting bullied so I went over and asked him to stop. It went a little bit like this:
Me: Dude, leave her alone. Him: Beat it, b*tch. *lots of arguing and swearing* Me: Ya know! The smartest thing that ever came outta your mouth was probably a penis. Him: *walks away*
Whenever I’m bored, I hit up my local orphanage and beat some of them up.
I mean honestly, what are they going to do, tell their parents? 😂😂
What's the difference between depression and a girl?
XXXTentacion can't seem to beat depression.
Mom, what happens if you swear at a church?
Well, honey, a tee posing nun with glowing red eyes and nunchucks will beat you.
Two to the one from the one to the three, I like good pussy and I like good trees, Smoke so much weed you wouldn't believe, And I get more ass than a toilet seat.
Three to the one from the one to the three, I met a bad bitch last night in the D, Let me tell you how I made her leave with me, Conversation and Hennessey.
I've been to the motherfuckin' mountain top, Heard motherfuckers talk, seen and dropped, If I ain't got a weapon I'ma pick up a rock, And when I bust yo ass I'ma continue to rock.
Getcha ass of the wall with your two left feet, It's real easy just follow the beat, Don't let that fine girl pass you by, Look real close 'cause strobe lights blind.
In fields of gold, where sunshine beams, Monkeys swing and play, it's their dreams. Their fur so soft, their eyes so bright, Picking cotton with delight.
Their little hands so quick and neat, Plucking the cotton, can't be beat. They chatter and laugh, they dance and play, In the fields all day, they'll stay.
Their tails so long, their ears so big, They're quite the sight, it's quite a gig. They're busy as can be, you see, In the fields of cotton, they're free.
So let us marvel at these little thieves, In the fields of gold, they give and receive. Their antics bring us joy and delight, In the fields of cotton, they're always right.
Why did Aaron's dad beat him? Because he tensed his ass.
My dad always used to beat me, but he never beat cancer.
No one will fight me, who is brave and strong enough to beat this beta simp femboy?
My wife told me to hang her the salt, so I beat the shit out of her. My name's Kyle, by the way.
What is one thing humans do before they eat?
They beat their meat to make nuggets.