Beat jokes
The penis has a sad life. His hair is always a mess, his family is nuts, his neighbor is an asshole, his best friend is a pussy, and his owner beats him.
He also stands up for kids who can't defend themselves.
Why did the cop show up early to the protest? To beat the crowd.
What do Rihanna and a DJ have in common?
They know how to get a beat down.
What's Michael Jackson's favorite thing to do when nobody's home?
Beat it.
I don't beat up midgets.
That would be punching down.
I actually want peace, not war.
That's what I always try reminding my girlfriend before beating her up.
Why don’t rappers ever get lost?
They always have a SICK FLOW to follow.
Why did the rapper wear a watch to the studio?
He wanted to make TIMELESS TRACKS.
What do you call it when a white person beats a black person?
A KKKO.
What did the mic say to the rapper?
"Don’t DROP me, bro!"
How does a rapper pay for his groceries?
With a SICK FLOW of cash!
What’s a rapper’s favorite MUSICAL NOTE?
G major.
What do you call a group of rappers stuck in traffic?
A cypher circle.
What’s a rapper’s favorite EXERCISE?
Flexin’.
A pedophile and a priest run a race.
You can’t beat yourself in a race!
What did the man say in the morning after beating up his wife?
"I woke up Chris Breezy."
What song did Michael Jackson come up with after his first sleepover with the kid?
"Just Beat It."
What is the difference between a broom and a mop?
It’s hard to beat my girlfriend when she’s holding the mop.
What’s the difference between video games and my dad?
My dad doesn’t beat me.
When a "Baby on Board" sticker is a little faded and beat up, you know the kid is at least a year old, and the car is safe to ram.