Beat jokes
Today is Elder Abuse Awareness Day.
Unfortunately, they're still not giving lessons on how to beat an annoying Alzheimer's patient without leaving a mark.
A gay man enters a bar. At the counter, he sees a skinhead sitting, which he somehow finds cute. He gathers all his courage, goes to the skinhead and whispers to him, "Do you want a blowjob?"
The skinhead punches the gay man in the face with his fist, causing him to go down. Then he drags him outside into the parking lot and kicks him again with his boots before going back inside and sitting down at the counter.
"Man," says the bartender, "but you beat him up quite a bit! What did the man even say to you that you were so freaked out?"
"I don't know," replies the skinhead, "something about a job..."
I don't get why cancer is so hard to beat. My friend's already on stage 4.
Phone: YEETED.
TikTok: DELETED.
Therapy: NEEDED.
Wife: BEATED.
The penis has a sad life. His hair is always a mess, his family is nuts, his neighbor is an asshole, his best friend is a pussy, and his owner beats him.
He also stands up for kids who can't defend themselves.
Why did the cop show up early to the protest? To beat the crowd.
What do Rihanna and a DJ have in common?
They know how to get a beat down.
What's Michael Jackson's favorite thing to do when nobody's home?
Beat it.
I don't beat up midgets.
That would be punching down.
I actually want peace, not war.
That's what I always try reminding my girlfriend before beating her up.
Why don’t rappers ever get lost?
They always have a SICK FLOW to follow.
Why did the rapper wear a watch to the studio?
He wanted to make TIMELESS TRACKS.
What do you call it when a white person beats a black person?
A KKKO.
What did the mic say to the rapper?
"Don’t DROP me, bro!"
How does a rapper pay for his groceries?
With a SICK FLOW of cash!
What’s a rapper’s favorite MUSICAL NOTE?
G major.
What do you call a group of rappers stuck in traffic?
A cypher circle.
What’s a rapper’s favorite EXERCISE?
Flexin’.
A pedophile and a priest run a race.
You can’t beat yourself in a race!
What did the man say in the morning after beating up his wife?
"I woke up Chris Breezy."