Baby Jokes

Your mom
in Difference

What’s the difference between issac Newton and the baby I just killed?

Issac Newton died a virgin!😎

Funny guy

What is the difference between a baby and a baked potato 140 calories

Anonymous
in Similarity

What do babies and grenades have in common? They both make noise when you throw them.

Anonymous
in Orphan

WHAT IS A UNBORN BABIES OLYMPIC SPORT… DODGE THE COATHANGER

Anonymous
in Orphan

WHAT IS A UNBORN BABIES OLIMPIC SPORT… DODGE THE COATHANGER

Anonymous

What word starts with M and ends in RAGE? MiscaRAGE. That joke never gets old…but neither does the baby…;)

4 posts hidden
Anon
in Nut

Account 🔢 for me too baby 👧 is so cute together with game slotjokes

Anonymous

One time Girl was telling her boyfriend if she could have sex with him for just a little bit and he said sure so she just started having sex. she asked him if we could have a baby , but he said sure and started going hard.she told him she was joking but he wouldn’t get off . So she did the 69 . and months later she died. and he said he thinks he killed her with sex.

Vadim

What’s the difference between dark humor and morbid humor? Dark humor would be 10 babies in one trashcan. Morbid humor would be one baby in ten trashcans.

Anonymous

How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

Morbidman60

I was going to tell a dead baby joke but i decided to abort

Joseph Wiseou

A baby and his father are sitting in a street cafe. a woman bends over to pick up her keys just as a gust of wind blows up the woman’s dress. “va va voom” the baby says. the dad chuckles and says “yes. I’d like to have sex with her too”

Anonymous

What is the worst thing about licking a bald fanny?

Putting the nappy on afterwards.

No

Hi there! My name is Michael Grover, and I am an explorer. Ever since I’ve been little, I’ve loved searching for new things. As a baby, my parents kept finding me in nooks and crannies around the house. “On the search” as they would say. By the age of 5, I had been to every continent on the planet, barring Antarctica. For my 12th birthday, my parents got me diving lessons, and by the time I was 13, I could scuba dive to a depth of 40 meters, as well as go cave diving. I got a pilot’s license by the age of 17, and I learned to sail just before my 18th birthday. Instead of going to university, I decided to travel around South America, exploring its rich jungles and beautiful landscapes. During my trip, I met my now wife who was also an explorer. For our honeymoon, we sailed around the Caribbean and we discovered 3 new islands which we named after the cats that I had growing up. Over the course of my life, I have come across great treasures and wondrous experiences. But in all my life, and in all my travels, I’m afraid I have never come across a single person who cared about what you just said.

Bill Nye is hot
in Child

Dream tweeted, and I quote “Babies kick pregnant women all the time but I do it one time and I’m the one arrested.”

Anonymous

How many baby’s does it take to paint a wall?

One if you throw it hard enough