Automotive jokes
New Teslas don't come with a new car smell; they come with an Elon Musk.
Race car backwards is race car.
Race car sideways is how Paul Walker died.
What is the difference between my Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies?
I don't keep my Lamborghini in my garage.
A guy crashed his Ford SUV. He couldn't escape.
Did you hear that Alicia wrecked her Lexus?
It's really a shame. She had to give her dad 3 months worth of blowjobs before he'd pay for it.
What do you call a man who loves Adidas and Puma and drives a Volkswagen? Potential Nazi.
What's the difference between a Lambo and 200 children in my basement? One screams; the children don't.
The Stigg
What has tree roots and what do I have for kids? What is the difference between a human and a used tire?
Tree roots are under the tree, and used tires are under the Hummer.
What happens when a black person gets in a car? The check oil light turns on.
What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Porsche?
I don't have a Porsche in the garage.
"Racecar" spelled backwards is "racecar," but "racecar" sideways is how Paul Walker died.
A jumper cable walked into a bar. The bartender said, "I'll serve you, but don't start anything!"
What's the difference between a BMW and a porcupine?
Unlike the porcupine, the pricks are on the inside.
Why are sex toys something to stuff in your asshole and not a big racecar?
One day a man was fixing a car, and he accidentally got brake oil in his mouth. He was about to spit it out, but then he thought, "Hmm, this tastes pretty good!" So he would keep drinking brake oil. But his friends were getting worried about him, and they were like, "Dude, this can't be healthy." But he said, "Don't worry. I can STOP anytime."
Q: What does a special ed student do when he wants to buy his first car?
A: Makes a Down payment.
Every male is expected to pass their driver's test. Paul Walker clearly failed his.
I had a dream I was a muffler last night...
I woke up EXHAUSTED! 😂😃
How does Stephen Hawking get clean?
He uses Tesco car wash.