Automotive jokes

What's the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms?

One’s a Good Year, the other’s a great year.

What is the difference between women and cars?

At least one of them retained their value after getting wrecked.

What’s the difference between a Black person and snow tires?

Snow tires still work after you take the chains off.

My boyfriend tried to make me have sex on the hood of his Honda Civic, but I refused. If I’m going to have sex, it’s going to be on my own Accord.

What do you call a man who loves Adidas and Puma and drives a Volkswagen? Potential Nazi.

What do you call a garage that is gay?

A gyarge.

Luckily, his funeral was a closed casket, sorry, his car blew a gasket.

What's Stephen Hawking's favorite type of car on fire? Hot wheels.

Roads be so rough in Oklahoma, I saw a high lifted truck get ended riding lower than a Hot Wheels car.

The Stigg and his fake ass life.

The Stigg

Every male is expected to pass their driver's test. Paul Walker clearly failed his.

What happens when a black person gets in a car? The check oil light turns on.

Did you hear that Alicia wrecked her Lexus?

It's really a shame. She had to give her dad 3 months worth of blowjobs before he'd pay for it.

I see what you did there.

"Racecar" spelled backwards is "racecar," but "racecar" sideways is how Paul Walker died.

I had a dream I was a muffler last night...

I woke up EXHAUSTED! 😂😃

What's the difference between a Lambo and 200 children in my basement? One screams; the children don't.

What's the difference between a BMW and a porcupine?

Unlike the porcupine, the pricks are on the inside.

My friend walked down the street and peed on a car.