Automotive Jokes

Year

What's the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms?

One’s a Good Year, the other’s a great year.

Difference

What is the difference between women and cars?

At least one of them retained their value after getting wrecked.

Difference

What’s the difference between a Black person and snow tires?

Snow tires still work after you take the chains off.

Sex

My boyfriend tried to make me have sex on the hood of his Honda Civic, but I refused. If I’m going to have sex, it’s going to be on my own Accord.

Nazi

What do you call a man who loves Adidas and Puma and drives a Volkswagen? Potential Nazi.

Car

What's Stephen Hawking's favorite type of car on fire? Hot wheels.

Road

Roads be so rough in Oklahoma, I saw a high lifted truck get ended riding lower than a Hot Wheels car.

Racism

What happens when a black person gets in a car? The check oil light turns on.

Incest

Did you hear that Alicia wrecked her Lexus?

It's really a shame. She had to give her dad 3 months worth of blowjobs before he'd pay for it.

Racecar

"Racecar" spelled backwards is "racecar," but "racecar" sideways is how Paul Walker died.

Dream

I had a dream I was a muffler last night...

I woke up EXHAUSTED! 😂😃

Basement

What's the difference between a Lambo and 200 children in my basement? One screams; the children don't.

Bmw

What's the difference between a BMW and a porcupine?

Unlike the porcupine, the pricks are on the inside.