Autistic jokes

What do you call an autistic person who is a dumbass? A dumbism.

Why should you put an autistic person in a refrigerator?

Because otherwise you’ll get a rotten vegetable.

(Not meant to be triggering).

My autistic son hates taking baths or showers.

I don’t blame him, I don’t like soggy vegetables either.

Everyone is autistic midgets.

What’s an autistic person's favorite movie:

A Quiet Place?

When the school shooter kills five people, and the autistic kid yells, "Heroes never die!"

An autistic man walks into a bra.

Why do ableist people hate autistics?

They're scared they'll never be special enough.

I'm autistic, and I find these so funny.

Astrophysics fact: If you count every star on a Saturday night, you're autistic.

What did the autistic kid order at a restaurant?

A disorder.

What do you call an autistic black man with a rifle?

Black ops.

When the school shooter pulls the fire alarm, and the autistic kid thinks it’s a rave party.

Why do people think Mozart was autistic?

Because he was probably retarded.

It doesn’t make much sense why autistic kids run down the hall screaming racecar noises.

I mean, they aren’t in wheelchairs, so I don’t know why they do it.

I'm autistic.