Autistic jokes
What do you call an autistic kid that’s good at art?
Artistic.
If Joey Deacon made his own company, it would be called The Joey Deacon Company; Walt Disney should have a run for its money.
P.S. The Joey Deacon Pictures logo would have some autistic people making noises to "When You Wish Upon A Star", with the castle being the Blue Peter ship instead.
I hate autistic people.
You're walking into a bar and you see 2 younger kids around 18. You call the manager to have them removed, but no one came down.
Later that night, you see the 2 18-year-olds, 1 was a girl and the other was a boy, so you call the manager down. No one came again. You confront them and tell them to leave, but one turns around and hits you. You are knocked out on the floor. When you wake up, there is a hard feeling in your a**. You turn your head around and there is an autistic girl with a strap-on in your a** going full on hard.
An autistic kid.
Michelle Obama wanted more vegetables in school.
An Autistic chef made hamburgers out of donkey meat.
He called them: “ASPERGER’S”
Why did the autistic kid walk across a busy road?
He was chasing his mind and got hit by a car.
What did the autistic kid say to his girlfriend after they broke up?
"I thought what we had was special!"
What's an autistic kid's favorite transformer?
Autistemist Prime.
What instrument does a special ed kid play? An autistic guitar.
When the school shooter says, "Everybody get down!" and the autistic kid thinks it's Simon Says: 🙋♂️🙋♂️🙋♂️
What do autistics, women, and chinks have in common? They can't fuckin' drive.
What does an autistic kid and a loaf of bread have in common?
They both have special needs.
Damn bro, are you Gold, Titanium, Sulfur, Titanium, and Carbon?
Cuz you be lookin AuTiSTiC.
Bro, imagine shooting a school for autistic people.
What do you call an Autistic kid?
A work of Daniel.
If you're feeling mad, punch an autistic kid. What's he gonna do, blabber to the teacher?
What do you call autistic people with guns? Special forces.
When the school shooter runs out of ammo: K a l m.
When he grabs a full mag: P a n i k.
When he looks back and doesn't see you, but you're hiding in one of the classrooms: K a l m.
When the autistic kid's Sketchers light up: P A N I K.
Why should you lose your virginity to an autistic person?
Because virginity needs to be lost with someone special.