Autistic jokes

I asked my brother who is autistic how he found his gf. He said on a special website.

What do you call an autistic kid with orange hair?

A boomerang.

I was driving through a neighborhood when I saw a sign that said "Autistic Child Zone." Then I thought to myself, "Oh shit, that wasn't a dog!"

What do you call an autistic My Little Pony?

Twilight Special.

I'm autistic, and I find these so funny.

It doesn’t make much sense why autistic kids run down the hall screaming racecar noises.

I mean, they aren’t in wheelchairs, so I don’t know why they do it.

VOTING QUARTERFINAL 1: LIKE: When the school shooter is about to leave your classroom and the autistic kid's sketchers light up.

DISLIKE: When the school shooter finds you and you think you're gonna die, but he remembers the time you gave him a pen. 🖌

Vote for the better joke!

When the emo kid is about to hang himself in the school bathroom, and the autistic kid starts swinging the rope like Indiana Jones!

What's an autistic kid's favorite transformer?

Autistemist Prime.

An autistic man walks into a bra.

VOTING FINAL This vote is for the best School Shooter joke of the month.

LIKE: When the school shooter is about to leave your classroom and the autistic kid’s sketchers light up.

DISLIKE: When you’re playing dead and the school shooter starts unbuckling his belt and you hear him say “This boy always had a fat ass”.

Vote for the better joke and the Joke of the Month will be announced in the comments tomorrow.

What do you call Autistic kids baking?

"Downies" with brownies.

An Autistic chef made hamburgers out of donkey meat.

He called them: “ASPERGER’S”

What did the autistic kid say to his girlfriend after they broke up?

"I thought what we had was special!"

What do you call an autistic person playing a guitar?

Guarded.

My friend in a wheelchair is autistic and tried to fight me, so I said: "If you wanna fight me, I'll run up the stairs, and by the time you get up the stairs, I'll already be down the stairs waiting," and he started crying.

The best part about having autism is being able to make jokes about genociding autistic people and no one can say a damn thing.

Astrophysics fact: If you count every star on a Saturday night, you're autistic.

What do you get when you beat up an autistic kid?

Mashed potatoes.

If you're feeling mad, punch an autistic kid. What's he gonna do, blabber to the teacher?