Ares jokes
"Deez nutz" are a hairline.
Why can’t dinosaurs clap? Cuz they are all dead.
"The truest things ARE the funniest things."
-Lollipop from JacknJellify, the BFDI series.
Why did the chef go get the eggs? Because eggs are egg-tastic!
Are you a hotdog stand? 'Cause you make my hotdog stand ;)
If I missed something, I'll give it to you. If you taked it, you are a mistake.
Yo mama is so pretty, she could get in a car crash because boys are staring at her.
Roses are red, the grass is greener, when I see you, I play with my wiener.
Why did the sick juice tree go to the hospital? Because it needed lemin-ade (not the cool type of sick, the one where you are in the hospital). Lemin-ade 1st ade.
You are so ugly, when you were born, your mother asked for a receipt.
Why are Americans bad at Clash of Royals?
Because they have already lost two towers!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Owl.
Owl who?
Who? Are you meant to ask "who?"
Why are the twin towers sad?
Because they ordered a pepperoni pizza and got a plane!
"Chris, I just saw five fat people, and you are one of them."
Why are 9/11 victims the fastest readers?
They can go through 100 floors in 7 seconds.
You: You are such a flick pain.
Me: You are flick pain to my sight.
I'm going to start taking confetti with me to therapy so when my therapist asks me, "How are you?" I can say "sad" and toss the confetti everywhere. It'll be like a real-life iMessage!
Mickey: I want a divorce!
Minney: Are you fricking crazy?
Mickey: No, I'm fricking Daisy!
Therapy - Expensive - Years of hard work - Emotionally draining - Tough to find
Screaming in the woods - Free - Immediate relief - Scares hunters enough to leave, therefore saving innocent animals - Potential to make friends with people who are also screaming in the woods.
Why are Americans so bad at Clash Royale? Because they already lost two towers.