Ares jokes

I'm going to start taking confetti with me to therapy so when my therapist asks me, "How are you?" I can say "sad" and toss the confetti everywhere. It'll be like a real-life iMessage!

Why are the twin towers sad?

Because they ordered a pepperoni pizza and got a plane!

Why are Americans so bad at Clash Royale? Because they already lost two towers.

Therapy - Expensive - Years of hard work - Emotionally draining - Tough to find

Screaming in the woods - Free - Immediate relief - Scares hunters enough to leave, therefore saving innocent animals - Potential to make friends with people who are also screaming in the woods.

My two moods are “I can’t believe I get to be a person” and “I can’t believe I have to be a person.”

You're a copycat from Ballarat You smell like a rat, you wear a hat and you are shaped like a baseball bat.

Song by John Rizk

Why are so many people making fun of people with wheelchairs?

Because they can’t stand up for themselves.

Me: What are we doing in HPE?

Friend: Fitness.

Me: Fitting deez nuts in your mouth.

Son: Dad, what are those two huge balloons on mommy's chest?

Dad: I don't see balloons, but I see boobs. I mean, yes, balloons.

Son: Are you sure they're balloons? Yesterday I heard Uncle Frank trying to get a milk dispenser working.

People who are bothering Gwen, stop. This is a joke site, and you guys should know that!

People, she is not even 40 or whatever. I see the comments, and they are so stupid. Do you even know her in life? No!!! Shut up and leave her alone!

Why are orphans always on the toilet?

Because they don't have anyone to give them some toilet paper!

Ok, ok, who is trying to be my "long lost brother"? Because last time I checked, I didn't have any sisters or brothers, so stop trying to steal my fame from me and give up. A lot of other people already know you are fake, so get off this website OR JUST STOP!!!

Orphans are humans like everyone else, so suck it up, rude jerks!

If you are having sex and your feet are out of the tent, it doesn't count.

Hi good morning, Alex, are you on? This is So Chat...

Hey Alya and JK Master, how are you guys doing? No one being an ass to you guys today, right? If so, I'll beat them up :)

"Roses are red, shut up and go to bed."

A zebra couldn't find any grass. Then he saw a monkey cooking. He thought to steal a little, but he was burned in the fore, and the smoke was all over him. But when he went to the ocean, it was still there, and zebras are stuck in this style forever.

My sister's friends are hilarious, like seriously, haha.

Hey Abygail ;) can we talk? I just wanna say that you prob are sexy :)