Ares jokes
On a scale from 1 to America, how free are you this weekend?
For some reason a group of emo kids are following me because I gave them a Happy Meal.
Your hairline is pushed back; we can see what you are thinking of.
The tables in my class are straight, but I can’t say the same thing for your hairline.
My sister and a basketball got certain things in common.
My sister's tits and ass are bouncy like a basketball.
Memes
Tell the person next to you to spell "me." When they do, say, "You forgot the D." They should respond with, "There is no D in ME." You say, "Not yet." If this does not go as planned, well, then you are fucked for life.
Yo mama is so fat, when she's walking down the street, there are cracks all over the sidewalk.
Me when people ask how old my girlfriends are:
"There's 2, there're 4, there're 6, there're 8."
Girls: Boys are like games, they're meant to get played.
Boys: Girls are like stones, the flat ones get skipped.
Ever had that feeling that suicidal people are a big contributor to the razor blade industry?
Well, they aren't.
Why?
They aren't repeated customers.
Q: Why are orphans so successful? A: Because when they were younger, they got told, "Go big or go home," and only had one option.
Why are orphans good at dodge ball?
Because no one misses them.
Why are life and a penis alike?
Women make both of them hard.
Why are all lesbians bad at math?
Because they can't multiply.
Why does Sonic wear gloves? Because his hands are cold.
Q: What did the kid on the airplane say?
A: "Those are two nice towers right there."
Why are tomatoes red? Because they contain the carotenoid lycopene!
XD RawR woof woof bark bark UwU meowwwww ROFL LMAO LOLOLOOLOLOL KEKW KEKW PEPELASUGH
Why are Americans so bad at class royals?
Because they already lost 2 towers.
What do you call a Japanese person when their knees are cured?
"Happynese" (happy knees).
You are so ugly when your mum dropped you off at school, she got fined for littering.