New Appearance Jokes - Page 67

Yo mama so ugly Joe Biden was jelly.

I asked my friend, "Hey, did you get a haircut?" and she said, "No." Then I'm like, "Really? Then why are you bald today?"

Girls with the name Carley have the biggest forehead on the earth, I mean, moon.

Danny Devito looks like one of those men with a short, yet thick penis.

Yo mama is so ugly, she scared the sh*t out of the toilet.

On a scale of 8 to 10, how good do I look?

When she saw her first strands of grey hair, she thought she'd dye.

So, she went to see the "You Should Be Shot" Photography Studio.

I used to know a guy from a nudist colony.

Man, I tell you, nothing looked good on him!

The man walks into a bar, reaches into his pocket, and pulls out a tiny piano and a tiny piano player. The piano player starts playing the piano. The guy next to him asks where he got that. The man says there is a genie out on the corner granting wishes.

So the man sitting next to him jumps up and runs outside. He says to the genie, "I want a million bucks." The genie snaps his fingers, and a million ducks appear in the road. The man comes back inside and says, "Hey, that genie is a little hard of hearing." The man says, "Well, did you really think I'd ask for a 12-inch pianist?"