ANS jokes
What movie does an orphan hate?
- No Way Home.
What's the main similarity between an elementary school math class and the USA?
The class divides.
What show does an orphan hate? Family Feud.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
My wife went to Niagara Falls and fell. She broke every bone in her body.
One year later, she recovered. She slipped on an orange peel and died.
A cock really has a sad life. He's hairs a mess, his neighbor's an arsehole, his best friend is a cunt.
My son, who is into astronomy, asked me how stars die. I said, "Usually from an overdose."
What does an apple and suicidal person have in common?
They're both hanging from a tree.
Person A: What do you call the dangly bit of an octopus?
Person B: Tentacles?
Person A: Ok *tickles person B ten times*
What do you call an act of “funny” discipline? A PUN-ishment!
What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? One less drunk.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan? Apples get picked. Orphans don't.
How many white police officers does it take to push an African-American gentleman down the stairs?
Push?! He fell...
What’s the best thing about dating an orphan?
You don’t need parental consent.
What does an orphan call a family photo?
A wishlist.
What do you call an autistic person? Names.
I'm autistic myself, so don't go crying in my comment section.
A dick has a sad life. His hair's a mess, his family is nuts, his neighbor's an asshole, his best friend's a pussy, and his owner beats him.
Why did God create yeast infections?
So women would know what it's like to live with an annoying cunt.
What's the difference between an anal and oral thermometer?
The taste.
I was at an emotional wedding. The cake was in tiers.