man: why cant an orphan use Verizon? kid: i dont know why man: cause they have a family plan kid: well i need to get another phone service now
You lost 30 lbs when you joined Weight Watchers, and lost another 10 lbs when they shaved your back
Your mom and dad are never comin back becuase dad is cumin for another kid
What do you call a giraffe giving a blow job to another giraffe? Getting neck!
Wife: “I want another baby” Husband: “That’s a relief, I also really don’t like this one”
What did one skeleton say to another? . . . . ...nothing... they are dead... what did you expect?
A flock of swallows were migrating south as a jet flew past them. "Why was that one flying so fast?" asked one. Another answers "Can't you see his tail is burning?"
student: why does everyone hate me
another student: Because U got The A last night
A baby is like another step. You use it just the same as the other steps.
A person had a child named bl another named es and one named s the next was named you , they were a very unholy family. There children were shamed upon because their names spell out bless you
When Albert Einstein was making the rounds of the speaker’s circuit, he usually found himself eagerly longing to get back to his laboratory work. One night as they were driving to yet another rubber-chicken dinner, Einstein mentioned to his driver (a man who somewhat resembled Einstein in looks & manner) that he was tired of speechmaking.
“I have an idea, boss,” his driver said. “I’ve heard you give this speech so many times. I’ll bet I could give it for you.” Einstein laughed loudly and said, “Why not? Let’s do it!”
When they arrived at the dinner, Einstein donned the driver's cap and jacket and sat in the back of the room. The driver gave a beautiful rendition of Einstein’s speech and even answered a few questions expertly.
Then a supremely pompous professor asked an extremely esoteric question about anti-matter formation, digressing here and there to let everyone in the audience know that he was nobody’s fool. Without missing a beat, the driver fixed the professor with a steely stare and said, “Sir, the answer to that question is so simple that I will let my driver, who is sitting in the back, answer it for me.”
Brian has a crush on a cute girl Sally from school so he goes and tells his dad about her and he says sorry son you cant like her she is your sister. So Brian is okay with it and he starts to like another girl Madison and he goes up to his dad and says I have a crush on this girl Madison and again the dad goes oh sorry son you cant like any girl in school they are all your sisters so he goes crying to his mom and says dad said I cant like any girl because they are all my sisters and the mom goes oh it's okay you can like any girl you want because he is not your dad.
Your hair line so bad we needed to pull it from another universes
One cow asks another cow, "Are you afraid of mad cow disease?" The other cow says, "Why should I be? I'm a helicopter."
>Sell PC >Go to Croatia >Try to fly to the US to meet female >US wont let me in >End up in Norway >female leaves me >Female gets arrested by feds >Feds read all my messages and see my dick pics
Just another day in the defib life
Some say under his helmet, is another smaller helmet and under that is another helmet and under that is a poster of Miley Cyrus
What do you call a country who needs another race just to be the best country in sports? America
Why do girls scratch their eyes in the morning?
Because they dont have another pair of Balls
So this guy and his wife figure out that she has gotten pregnant. The baby is due March 31st. Well the guy is at work and he gets a call from his wife. She tells him she is going into labor. He rushes to pick her up, and once he is on the road he starts speeding. Eventually he hits another car and swerves off the road into a ditch. He wakes up in the hospital, looks around but doesn’t see his wife. He asks the doctor, is my wife okay, she was carrying my child. The doctor said the wife is fine and the baby is in good health. 10 seconds later he goes “APRIL FOOLS! Your wife is dead and your child has brain damage
Lynching is just another word for "hanging around".
