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Alternative

Alternative jokes

Day

After God created 24 hours of alternating darkness and light, one of the angels asked him, "What are you going to do now?"

God said, "I think I'm going to call it a day."

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    • Memes

    Alternative memes

    Fish

    The other day I took my Grandma to one of those fish spas where the little fish eat your dead skin.

    It was way cheaper than having her buried in the cemetery.

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    • Email

    What does the Trump administration use instead of emails? Alternative fax.

    Butcher

    I went to the local butcher's and asked him what happened to his Saturday boy. The butcher replies, "I had to fire him, I found him with his dick in the meat slicer!"

    "What did you do with the meat slicer?" I asked.

    The butcher says, "I had to fire her too!"

    Alternative punchline:

    "I had to call social services, she was only 14."

    Politician

    If you got a priest, a Rhodes scholar, and a politician in a room, what would you get?

    The Royal Commission.

    Alternatively, Tony Abbott.

    Spider-Man

    Why'd the alternate universe Spider-Man do so well on his driving test? He's an excellent parallel Parker.

    Power

    In an alternate universe: I don't know how to solve the power of 10, but I do know how to pay taxes.

    Home

    I remember locking my door, but then I went downstairs to hear someone say, "I'm inside your home." I said, "GTFO my house, BICH!"

    Memes

    Alternative memes

    Community

    The disparity between WJE and SW needs to be studied. It's insane how different their community is compared to ours, and how much more ADVANCED they are. Like right now, they're engaging in a forum mafia-reminiscent "War Game" which sounds like a total blast. We as a community are MISSING OUT!!! Most of the people here are either trolls, using it as a private messaging alternative, or just PLAIN BORING. There's way too many mods and too few users here. SOMETHING needs to be done!!!

    PSA: STOP MAKING SHITTY ONE WORD POSTS!!! THEY ARE NOT INTERESTING, THEY CLOG UP THE FEED, AND ARE COMPLETELY UNNECESSARY. THIS COMMUNITY IS NOT FOR SLAMMING YOUR HEAD ON YOUR KEYBOARD AND CHATTING WITH YOUR FRIEND BECAUSE YOUR OWN DECISIONS LED YOU TO REQUIRE THIS SITE AS A CHATTING ALTERNATIVE. THIS IS THE WORSTJOKESEVER COMMUNITY, NOT YOUR PERSONAL CHAT BUBBLE. MAKE INTERESTING POSTS ABOUT INTERESTING TOPICS AND CONVERSATE *AS A COMMUNITY!!!!!*

    Slightly Edited rules and dependability.

    1. Prohibited Content: Pornographic or explicit material is strictly prohibited. Images from movies or games may be exempt depending upon contextual appropriateness.

    2. Harassment: Any form of repeated or excessive harassment outside of friendly joking is not tolerated. Warnings and bans will be given accordingly. Depending on the severity of the issue the warnings can range… Read more

    Alternative Community