Animal jokes
What type of horse can jump higher than a house?
All houses can't jump.
What do you call an ugly, grey thing?
Cinderelephant!
We were at a restaurant today, and my dad was talking about a place called Sea Ranch.
I asked, "What do they raise there? Sea horses?"
A bear is like your best mate, Harry.
If you stab them, they die from a stab wound.
Yo mama so stupid, she joined the Squid Game as a sea life lover because she thought it was a game of whoever catches the most octopuses wins.
What do you call a sleeping cow?
Ground beef.
How do bees go to school?
They go on a buzzzzzzzzzzz.
What type of shirt do kangaroos wear? Jumpsuits.
What is a dog?
A pet.
How do rabbits travel?
By hareplane.
What's a snake's favorite subject?
Well, there are two: hisss-tory, but some prefer maths; those weirdos are adders.
How to become a monkey?
Put a red dot on your forehead.
WAAAAAAAAAATERSHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARKY!
Why didn't the bear leave home?
He could not bear leaving his family.
Why do duckies wipe after they poop?
Their butt quack.
A bear walks into a bar and asks the barkeep, "Can I have a grilled . . . cheese?"
The barkeep asks the bear, "What's with the big pause?" The bear says, "Well, I'm a bear."
Why was the cow afraid?
He was a cow-herd.
What do you call a drunk cat? A drunk cat.
Orphans are monkeys.
What do you call a suspicious dog?
A sussy bark-er.