roses are red violets are blue if I slapped you that’d be animal abuse
What animal lies.A lion
What do you call a lesbian dinosour? Lick-alot-a-pus
What does the Fox say ? Fraka - kaka - kaka - kow
A Chicken walks into a Bar.
He Orders Dr. Pepper
He then lays a good Scrambled Egg.
What do dogs do when they lose their tail? -- They go to the retail store.
Brown bear Brwn bear what do you see i see a blind man looking at me blind man blind man what do you see. Oh sorry i forgot you cant see.
why can't you play with a cheetah?
Because they are cheat-ahs
I had an animal pun contest today. He started off by saying something-I don’t remember. Then I replied TOUCAN play that game. He went silent and my other friend barged in and said, “Don’t you thick he’s CHICKENing out?” I said, “yeah, just stop HORSING around!” He came back with one and I ended it by saying, “Ok, lets MOOOOOve on cow[now]” Welp that’s it.
( Guy 1: Why my cat's so angry ? ) ( Guy 2: Because she wants to eat your big sausage ) ( Guy 1: Don't you ? ) ( Guy 2: Yeah it seems delicious ) ( Guy 1: Mmm so .. w-wait what are you doing ? I didn't think you mean the one in my lunch :< where are you leaving #_# ) **Meow ...** ( Guy 1: Shut up i will never feed you this sausage it's not for you :< -_- </3 )
what do crows get after they buy a phone? a cawing card
The doe comes out of the woods, shakes herself, and says "I can't believe I did that for 2 bucks!"
A family put their kid and their dog in an Orphanage but came back for only the dog.
What do you call a very rude bird? A mockingbird.
Whats a cow's strongest part of their body?
Their "Calfs"!
A few days ago, I phoned up the spiritual leader of Tibet, and he sent me a large goat with a long neck. Turns out I phoned Dial-a-Llama.
Why did the dog cross the road twice? Because he was trying to catch a boomerang
You can assume a horse is called a great jumper when the horse’s name is “Polo Neck.”
Why is a elephent big,grey, and hairy?
A Grasshopper walked into a bar and sat down at the counter.....The Bartender looked at him and said, "We have a drink named after you". The Grasshopper replied, "Who names a drink Steve?"
