Animal jokes
One day me and my friend Howard the duck went into the bar. I ordered a drink. Howard told the waiter to put it on his... BILL.
When do you take a cow to the movies?
On a mooo-vie!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Rabid cow.
Rabid cow who?
Hold on, I need to get my gun...
Nolan is a mole, who lives in a hole, and then had intercourse with a troll.
What did the boy goat say to his girlfriend?
You're my boo!
Memes
One day, there was an ugly barnacle. It was so ugly that everyone died. The end!
pop pop meow?
Three copycats on a boat, one jumps off. How many are left? Zero, because they're copycats!
All doggies go to heaven - or so I've been told.
They run and play along the streets of Gold.
Why is heaven such a doggie-delight...
Why, because there's not a single cat in sight.
What do you call an owl that does magic?
Hooodini.
How do bees get to school?
They take the buzz.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Who.
Who who?
Stop acting like an owl!
What can fly?
Bird.
I can't see the bee.
It's by the beehive.
Why was Timmy sad? Because his dad stapled a frog to his forehead.
You
You
You're the cow.
It was so windy I saw a chicken lay the same egg twice!
Yo mama so stupid, when I told her she needed some cats, she came back with...
CRASH, ARENA, TURBO STARS!
My life is such an udder disappointment. What an udder failure!
Roses are red, get on your knees, and bark for me!