Animal jokes

[God creating the parrot] OK, HOW ABOUT A TYE-DYE CHICKEN THAT SCREAMS ACTUAL WORDS AT YOU?

What do you call a broken chicken?

A broken chicken.

What did a jockey's manager say to him before the race?

"Use the horse!"

Where do cows go on a holiday? Moo-Zealand! 😜

Why do the French eat snails?

They don’t like fast food!

Yo mama's so stinky that whenever she walks into a building, the flies drop dead!

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Cow.

Cow who?

Silly cows go moo!

What dog can’t see a dog that’s blind?

I love my dog, Sadie.

How many squirrels does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two, but how they got in there's the real mystery!

Donibobes is an owl. (hehe look up donibobes YT!)

When a cat gets a sibling, do they say, "Oh, shit! Another mew kid?!?!?!"

What do you call a cow that has stuff growing on it?

Mosscow

When your mom comes in at night then sees your... sleeping, but sees something moving, so she gets a chair and whacks it, then she says, "I thought it was a mouse."

Why wasn’t the frog 🐸 crying?

Because he was hoppy.

What animal can not be trusted?

A lion 🦁.

What do you call a cow with no leg?

I put my leg up in the air sometimes, singing ayo, I'm a flamingo...

If you don't like my spelling, Explain Bear, have you realized I'm a duck and you are a bear? I've got more internet power and meme power, so shut the duck up and get a life and stay off my property and the internet.

My cousin said he wonders why people have sex with animals, and now I can’t stop thinking about it.

Ol’ McDonald had a farm e-I-e-I-oh.