Animal jokes
What is orange and sounds like a parrot?
A: A carrot!
What do you call a wingless fly?
A walk!
Why did the chicken cross the road? To run from poachers.
Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl in the bathroom?
Because it has a silent “p.”
Nothing lasts long these days!
As Confucius says, "Hare today, gone tomorrow!"
Why do crabs never give to charity?
Because they're all shellfish.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Why?
To visit the ugly witch's house.
Knock, knock...
Who's there?
The chicken!
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Heehheehehehehehehe
To get to the other side. Ahaahahahahahahahahahahaa!
http://zebrahumor.wordpress.com has more zebra jokes.
What did the daddy bullet say to his son when he missed the bull and hit something brown and gross?
"That is bull crap!"
A bear walked into the bar and said, "Can I have a cola and a...whisky?" The bartender says, "What's with the big paws?"
What was the first animal in space?
The cow that jumped over the moon!
What do you call a fish with no parents?
An orfin.
I don’t believe in reincarnation now, and I didn’t believe in it when I was a hamster.
—Shane Richie, British actor
Why was the cow afraid?
He was a cow-herd.
What do you get when you cross a donkey with an onion?
A piece of ass that makes your eyes water.
What animal has more lives than a cat?
A frog. It croaks every night.
Why do bees stay in the hive during winter?
... S'warm!
My dog used to chase people on a bike a lot. It got so bad, I finally had to take his bike away.
Man: Knock, knock...
Boy: Who's there?
Man: Bear...
Boy: Bear who?
Man: Bear bottom.