Animal jokes
People say killing two birds with one stone is a good thing, but when I did it, people just looked horrified.
Why was the dog stealing shingles?
He wanted to be a woofer.
What are cheetahs' favorite chips?
Cheetah Puffs!
I love to smell skunks, but I lick their stinky butt. It's delicious. My breath smells like fart.
What is cheetah's favorite taste to run fast?
Cheetah outta here!
Your uncle Jack is stuck on a horse.
Would you help your uncle "Jack" off the horse?
Your uncle Jack is stuck on the horse...
Would you help him jack off the horse?
Producer: We need to stop testing out products on animals.
CEO: Shampoo companies do it all the time.
Fairchild Republic making the A-10 Thunder Bolt.
Please follow me at Mary.cristal03 on TikTok.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Really, there is an answer, and he never made it across, so...
Why you gay, bruh? I know why I'm gay. I got the wolf pack protectors spirit in me, YA BOIIIII!
Why are koalas so cool? Because LL Cool J ama said "knock you out!"
A cow in an earthquake is called a milkshake.
Why can't you make fun of a bunny's head?
Because they have a hare-line.
How do u make an octopus laugh?
Ten-tickles! Hahaha.
Llama: Hey sheep, let's play cards.
Sheep: Llama, fuck off!!
Llama: What's your damn problem?
Sheep: Nothing, I'm just having a Baahd day, okay dick head?
What's a whale's favorite James Bond movie? "License to Krill."
Who is more loyal: a dog or a wife?
Well, lock them both in your trunk for two hours and drive around and see which one is happy to see you.
Child: *drinking milk*
Farmer: Hey, what are you doing?
Child: Oh, I just milked one of your cows.
Farmer: We don't have any cows, we only have bulls.
Child: *realizes*
My grandpa has the heart of a lion,
and a lifetime ban from the zoo.
Watch this dog https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gM8gBVjVTaQ