Ani jokes

Always breathing down my neck, my vampire girlfriend does not give me any space.

I wanted to fall off a cliff, sadly, there aren't any cliffs near my house.

Luke asks his friend, "How old is your father?"

James replied, "He's as old as me."

Luke then said, "It doesn't make any sense."

James then said, "He became my father when I was born."

I was sitting in class when my teacher said, "Have any questions?" the suspended Class clown said, "Who's Joe?" So the teacher said, "Joe who?" So the clown said, "Joe Mama!" So I said, "What in the BALLS?" So I ended up staying in detention with the clown, ah, so cozy!

Me: Hey God, are you there? It's me, Michael.

God: *SILENCE*

Me: If any gods exist, they better say or do something this instant!

God: *SILENCE*

I swear bro, this time I don't want any jokes on 9/11. Like people actually died, like that shit is just plane wrong. 💀

Why do orphans hate any milk?

Their dad did not come back for 10 years. Oh, sorry, he got lost in the store! 🤧

Any more song suggestions?

Yo mama is so dumb, she plays Pokémon and doesn’t catch any.

"How does dry skin affect you at work?""You don’t have any elbow grease to put into it."

I asked the librarian if they had any books on anxiety.

She replied with, "Won't you worry a lot about returning it late?"

If BlessedBrian were ANY LESS intelligent, he’d have to be WATERED twice a week.

If Leo were any slower, she’d be going BACKWARD.

If BlessedBrian were any more two-faced, he’d be a Rubik’s Cube.

I tried my best to think of some puns, but I'm gonna have tibia honest: I don't have any puns left, but I'm pretty sternum, so I'll think of a few puns here and there. It took a lot of spine to do this.

I prank called someone and I said, "Is there a Missis Wall there?" They said no. Is there a Mr. Wall there? They said no. Are there any Walls there? They said no. Then what's holding up your building?

It's been a while since I've talked to either Prince or tj. Do any of you boys wanna chat? Plapls?

What’s an orphan’s least favorite drink?

Milk, because no one came back with any.

Where's is the candy, sir???

Over there.

(kid steps in van)

I don't see any candy.

Stephen Hawking can pass any test, but there's one test he can't pass. It is the PACER test.