Why do dogs lick their balls? Because they can.
Why did I have to pay $300 on Uber?
I had to get from your forehead to your big ass nose.
If you are a girl--you are allowed to read this.
Look down your shirt and spell attic.
"Aww, it's a boy, let me cut off the ombelicul cored, sir, that's his penis!"
"It's a girl."
Son: Dad, what are those two huge balloons on mommy's chest?
Dad: I don't see balloons, but I see boobs. I mean, yes, balloons.
Son: Are you sure they're balloons? Yesterday I heard Uncle Frank trying to get a milk dispenser working.
Jugs!
Looks dragon!
Draggin' these nuts across yo face!
What does your head come out of... your brain?
What wiggles and waggles?
A floppy dick!
What's the definition of disgusting?
Sticking 5 oysters up your grandmother and sucking 6 out!
Sonic Boom in my ass.
Why is the fanny flat? Because so it can flop about.
Me say, "Crack my finger."
My hubby crack my finger.
Now say it backwards.
"Deez nutz" are a hairline.
What do you call a fish with no booty?
What do you call a fish with no neck?
If I have ligma and you have ligma, how about you ligma balls? 😏 (It’s all about how you pronounce the end.)
Your forehead is so big, you got an eight-head.
Best thing ever right here.
So, there is this app on your phone called ringer. Go into it. There is a 12-15 digit number. Enter that into my phone, my dick will get 12-15 inches longer.
Your momma's so fat, when I went to suck her tit, I got a mouthful of knee.
