Always jokes

Do you have a sunburn, or are you just always this hot?

My 3 year old sister kept saying, "I like your cut, G." Every time she does, I dodge and close my eyes, but she's the one who always ends up running.

What is the difference between a woman and ice? The ice always comes back.

What animal do you always find at a baseball game? A bat.

What’s the worst thing about being suicidal?

The school shooter will always spare you.

Why is 10 always afraid?

Because it is between 9 and 11.

House parties are like churches: there's always an underage kid getting fucked somewhere.

How do you annoy Pinocchio?

Ask him, "Do you always tell lies?"

I can always tell if someone is lying just by looking at them.

I can also tell if they are standing.

I'd make a masturbation joke.

But they always get out of hand.

I always ask gay people what LGBTQ means, but I never get a straight answer.

Me: Hey friend!

Friend: Yes?

Me: What is the missing sense? Seeing, smelling, _, tasting, hearing.

Friend: Touch.

Me: What do you spawn on Minecraft always? (jk only 99.99%)

Friend: Grass.

Me: And you get?

Friend: Touch grass.

I'm always hanging in there.

Hanging on the wall.

"Prostitutes love their jobs; they're always having a blast!"

Latias is red.

Latios is blue.

You should always remember to put up your curtains because I Pikachu.

My ex died in an anchorage accident.

She always was a sleeping hooker.

Why is a brick always hard? Because the Indians played with it enough.

I will always remember the last noise I hear in my school, "oogga booga motherf***ers," click, boom!

Orphan: Am going to see my mom in the kitchen because they are always in there.

Orphan: Realizes.

Tip for Kindness for the day.

Tip one. Always speak up for yourself.

Yes, letting someone else speak up for you is nice but also speak up for yourself, be brave if a mean bully comes along. Speak up for yourself and others if they need it. Best, Gwen