Always jokes

Why do 911 jokes always fail?

They always crash and burn!

I always think that percussions are golden, but cheeks are brass.

Why does an orphan hate the internet?

Because he's always on the homepage.

Why can’t you play games with cats? Because they always ‘cheetah’.

Why are cheetahs not good at hiding?

They’re always spotted!

Why does an orphan always try to escape the orphanage?

Because he wants to get money to buy a family since they won't buy him.

I love playing zebra crossing, but I always get run over.

Why do many New Yorkers like watching Spider-Man?

Because he’s always on the webcast.

All real chemists know that alcohol is always a solution.

I did this chemistry joke yesterday, but I didn't get a reaction.

People who make puns always get pun-ched by people.

Never trust stairs, they're always up to something.

I always feel better when my doctor says something is normal for my age, but then think dying will also be normal for my age at some point.

Why is the number 10 always scared?

Answer: He’s in the middle of 9/11.

Emos,

They're always a cut above the rest.

Say what you want about Jeffery Dahmer, but he always managed to get a head.

I dated an Indian girl for about six months. She was always Sikhing attention.

Why don't amputees ever get cold? They're always wearing their stump warmers.

Bro, my friend is always using zodiacs as an excuse.

The other day he said he couldn't hang out with me because of cancer. I told him to fuck off. Then I realized why he was mad after that...

I always park in handicapped spaces at the hospital.

Just to test their patients.

9/11 jokes aren’t funny.

They always crash and burn.