I don't like 9/11 jokes because they always talk about how bad of a plane driver my dad is.
Why do New Yorkers get what Spider-Man is saying?
Because he always makes spider-sense.
How is an orphan like a boomerang?
They always come back!
Why are hospitals always freezing?
They need to keep the vegetables cold.
Why do cheetahs always win?
Because they cheat!
Teacher: Okay class, look at the person to the right of you and describe them with one word.
Me: *looks to the right of me and sees the pick-me girl* "Penny."
Teacher: *shocked* How is she a penny?
Me: 'Cause she's two-faced, flat, and always in someone's pants. Not to mention worth practically nothing.
I am always high, welcome to bipolar disorder. LMAO. (Don't bother to like or comment, I just had to say this.)
Why can't Heaven and Hell ever be one 2nd paradise?
Heaven always has 5-star reviews.
Latias is red.
Latios is blue.
You should always remember to put up your curtains because I Pikachu.
My family is lucky I was born so smart. Every time my Dad is struggling at work, he always turns to me when he needs to get ahead.
I always ask gay people what LGBTQ means, but I never get a straight answer.
Who is always looking spot on?
The cheetahs.
Bro, I’m so pissed. There is always that one kid in the class who the teacher helps. I hate that guy in the wheelchair.
My girlfriend calling me: I'm home alone ;)
Me: I know, you always are...
Why do orphans always get an iPhone X?
Because it doesn’t have a home button.
Why do melons always have big weddings?
Because they cantaloupe!
What kind of veggie is always getting itself into a hard situation?
A pickle.
Why do orphans hate p*rn hub?
They always see a stepdad and stepsis.
Why don’t rappers ever get lost?
They always have a SICK FLOW to follow.
Why don’t rappers play hide and seek?
Because good luck finding someone who’s always in the booth!
