Agriculture

Agriculture Jokes

Cow

Two cows are standing in a field.

Cow 1: Did you hear about the outbreak of mad cow disease?

Cow 2: Good thing I'm a helicopter.

Pea

What was the incontinent farmer's greatest problem? He managed his carrot patch but couldn't control his peas!

Cow

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

What do you call a cow with three legs? Lean beef.

What do you call a cow with two legs? Read the title.

Grape

What did the grape say when he got squished? Nothing, he just let out a little wine.

Cucumber

What’s 12 inches and is moist inside?

My record holding cucumbers, locally grown at my farm.

Cow

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Interrupting cow.

Interrupting cow wh---

MOOOO!

Boy

Did you hear about the boy who sat under a cow?

He got a pat on the head.

Cow

My cow just wandered into a field of marijuana. The steaks have never been so high...