Agriculture jokes
What kind of vegetable makes the best receptionist?
Cauliflower.
Q: What do you call a cow with only two legs?
A: Lean meat.
The flower made a phone call and became cauliflower.
Why did the farmer go to the strip club?
Because he was looking for his hoe.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the idiot's house.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
The chicken.
What's the hardest part when making skimmed milk?
Throwing the cow across the lake.
What do you call a policeman/farmer?
A farmer in blue!
Why did the chicken ride across town? Because he was being taken to Tyson.
What did the bull say when he went to college?
Bison!
What do pigs and ink have in common?
They both go in a pen.
Two old Indian ladies out picking potatoes, one lady stops, staring at this huge potato, turning it round and round.
The other old lady says to her, "What are you doing?" She says, "These potatoes remind me of my husband's nuts."
She says, "Oh my, are they really that big?" She said, "No, they're that dirty. lololol"
Did you hear about the tomato and the lettuce race?
Well, the lettuce was ahead, and the tomato was trying to ketchup!
If you wear cowboy clothes, are you ranch dressing?
We were at a restaurant today, and my dad was talking about a place called Sea Ranch.
I asked, "What do they raise there? Sea horses?"
I lick cows for my mother.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
It's still called a "cow."
Why do cows die?
'Cuz they are to beef.
What do you call a gay cow? A gay cow.
What do retarded cops give tickets for?
Going over 45 in a potato zone.
What do you call a dancing cow that dies while dancing?
Dead mooves.