Age jokes

A customer asked me to look at their hairline. I time traveled back to the dinosaurs.

What’s the difference between your mum and your nan?

Your nan's a GILF!

Yo mama so old, she walked into an antique store, and they didn't let her leave.

I f..... Nan and dust came out. 😂

In the Middle Ages it was illegal for a blind man to become a king.

I mean, I don't see why not.

Your mama so old, her first Christmas was the first Christmas!

In a deep village in Germany, an old man asked his granddaughter, "What are you doing?"

His granddaughter replies, "Removing Polish with chemicals."

Grandpa said, "When I was young, I did the same."

Wanna hear a clean one?

Old man takes a bath with bubbles.

Wanna hear a dirty one?

Bubbles is the 14 year old next door.

Few jokes (sorry if they have already been used).

1 I couldn't figure out why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.

2 Why does Humpty Dumpty love autumn? Because he always has a great fall.

3 Have you heard the one about the skunk? Never mind, it really stinks.

4 It's always windy in a sports arena. All those fans.

5 What is the best day to go to the beach? Sunday, of course!

6 Comic Sans walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve your type here."

7 What's the easiest way to get straight As? Use a ruler.

8 Why were they called the Dark Ages? Because there were lots of knights.

To all the children on this website, hello!!!!! Hey!!!! How is life treating you?

(BTW I'm a kid, too. I'm Hayley, and I'm turning 13. My B-day is 10/08/2008.)

If her age is on the timer, I don't care if she's a minor.

What did the pirate say when he turned 80?

"Aye, matey."

What do you call an 18-year-old orphan?

Homeless.

So, today is my birthday. Today, I am 13, but yesterday I am going to turn 10. But I am not even going to school to know the number ten, because one time at 10 p.m. in the morning it was so cold in my hot room, so I went outside to drive my car. But I stopped because the light turned green. I was taking a bath in the front of my car, and it didn’t have a bin, so I am taking a sh$t.

Your hairline is so expired, it’s more expired than your milk!

My friend jokingly confessed to me she did prostitution (consensual).

She wasn't joking. :0

We are 15....

What goes up but never comes down?

Your mama is so old, her first Christmas, she was a Wiseman's +1.

Yo momma's so old that even scientists get baffled about where she lived before Earth was created.

I’m rather relaxed about death.

From quite an early age, I’ve regarded it as part of the deal, the unwritten guarantee that comes with your birth certificate.