Age jokes

What did the pirate say when he turned 80?

"Aye, matey."

What do you call an 18-year-old orphan?

Homeless.

If her age is on the timer, I don't care if she's a minor.

To all the children on this website, hello!!!!! Hey!!!! How is life treating you?

(BTW I'm a kid, too. I'm Hayley, and I'm turning 13. My B-day is 10/08/2008.)

Yo mama's so old, she knew Burger King when he was a prince.

Your hairline goes so far back, I remember seeing it in the Stone Age.

What does Leo have in common with a newspaper?

They both love to yap and babble, and they always get fondled by old people.

SLADE is proof that mental aging can go in REVERSE.

What goes up but doesn't come down?

Your forehead and hairline are like friends; they go way back.

Yo momma is so old, her birthday's expired.

Your hairline's so far back, you need binoculars to see it.

Man, your hairline is so far back, archaeologists couldn't find it.

Pretend you are an old man who is 77 years old and there are 7 doors, which door should you pick?

The seventh door.

Your hairline goes further back, even further back than the Precambrian Time.

Your forehead and your hairline must be old friends, because they go way back.

Your hairline is so expired, it’s more expired than your milk!

A guy gets home from work to see his girlfriend packing, and he asks her why she is packing. The girl says, "Because I found out you're a pedophile." The guy goes, "A pedophile?" And she says, "Yes." The guy goes, "That's a big word for a 12-year-old."

Luke asks his friend, "How old is your father?"

James replied, "He's as old as me."

Luke then said, "It doesn't make any sense."

James then said, "He became my father when I was born."

Your mama is so old, her first Christmas, she was a Wiseman's +1.

Your hairline is so far back my grandpa said he had a glimpse of it in the 1960s.