Age jokes
What is the best cure for aging?
Suicide.
Who is the least young Dave?
Dave-on.
Me: What's the difference between me and my grandpa?
Friends: What?
Me: I've been alive for the past 14 years.
Why is the last part of orphanage "age?"
Because it doesn't matter your age.
If she’s old enough to smoke, She’s old enough to choke.
If she’s old enough to pee, She’s old enough for me.
"Ring Ring! Hi, I've been needing to call you. Your hairline has been found by Dora after 25 years!"
Is it weird that a milk carton has a date, and I don’t?
Hi, I'm new here and I'm 11. I'm just bored and want a girlfriend.
Does anyone have Snapchat or Twitter? I can show you what I look like ;)
Chimmy: (smoking because of fireplace)
Chimmy2: You're too young to smoke.
I like my dates like I like my wine...
Locked in a cellar and aged for 12 years.
What's the difference between me calling my girlfriend a pedophile and her calling me one?
Oh wait, I am because she's 10.
What is common with dark humor and unvaccinated kids?
Neither do ever grow old.
As a 13 year old, online dating is a tough thing. Every time I meet someone new, they end up in jail.
What did the pretty young pre-pubescent 14 year old boy say when he got a homosexual pedophile for Christmas?
He said he was awfully touched!
My friend told me he had a sister. I asked if she was hot, and he said she was 8. That wasn't my question.
SLADE is proof that mental aging can go in REVERSE.
A guy gets home from work to see his girlfriend packing, and he asks her why she is packing. The girl says, "Because I found out you're a pedophile." The guy goes, "A pedophile?" And she says, "Yes." The guy goes, "That's a big word for a 12-year-old."
I f..... Nan and dust came out. 😂
A famous celebrity admitted that she was non-straight, suffered from a rare condition that changed the colour of her skin, did not age well, only wanted to be compensated for her work in the 5th month of each year at her favourite store while laying down:
TO GET FAYE'S WAY, PAY GRAY, GRAY, GAY FAYE WRAY IN MAY AND LAY HER DOWN AT "THE BAY". OK!!!
A father of a young girl comes to meet the doctor.
Father: Doctor, how is my daughter's report?
Doctor: Congrats, your daughter is pregnant.
Father: WTF ?????? My daughter is 10 years old and unmarried!