Aed jokes
What’s 23 times 2?
A potato.
A man walks into his bedroom where his wife is carrying a sheep under her arm and says, "This is the pig I've been fucking."
Wife says, "That's not a pig; that's a sheep, dumbass."
Husband says, "I was talking to the sheep."
How do you scare a lot of people in New York?
Open a mobile hotspot named "Delta Inflight Wifi."
Organise my brother's bucks party and got confused when he asked for a hot 22 year old for I brought him 20 two yr Olds....
Good thing my brother's a little bit different.
Ever have an Italian sausage in a can?
What’s the difference between a life and a nuclear bomb?
I don’t have a life.
A man is on his deathbed in prison by electric chair.
The man who controls the chair asks for any last words.
The prisoner replies with: “Can you hold my hand?”
A man walks into a doctor's office, naked and wrapped in Glad Wrap.
The doctor replies with: "I can clearly see your nuts."
What is a show an orphan will never be able to relate to?
"Full House".
One does not simply hand over a jar of dirt.
I'm not a robot, but orphans are.
Wanna know why the plane actually crashed?
Someone turned off flight mode.
(Or a kid just turned on airplane mode.)
The sexy towers are just like my sexy toes because when I crashed a plane into the tower, it burned and bled.
One day this kid says to his dad, "Dad, they bully me at school."
His dad asks why, and the kid says, "They bully me because I got no hands."
Then his dad says, "Who would do such a thing like that? I want to know who they are. Point at them!"
Q: How do you know when Putin is lying?
A: His lips move.
Yep, if someone says to you, "I can't roast trash," say, "Well, some trash is used for recycling, and that is why you have a baby brother!"
If Bruce Willis (the guy in the Christmas movie Die Hard) dies of a Viagra overdose, would that mean he truly dies hard?
POV: Your mum is a bomber.
What do a 100-year-old pornstar and The White Stripes have in common? Icky Thump!
What do you call a Gary Dinosaur?
A mega-sore-ass.