Aed jokes
My boss said she would've loved to meet Bill Cosby as a child. I don't get why I'm getting arrested. I was just making sure his dream came true.
What's the difference between the Twin Towers and an emo bitch?
The Twin Towers hit the ground.
What do you get when you cross breed a bear with a retarded person?
A feminist (a hairy and brainless beast).
There was a kid crying. I asked him where his parents were. He cried more. I love working at an orphanage.
It's been known that Michael Jackson decided to do a song for the soundtrack for Free Willy, because he thought that he would get free willy in exchange for composing a song.
Be careful, everybody, I have a red dot on my forehead, so I can record everybody!
What's the difference between Jedi and a rapist?
Nothing, they both use the Force to get what they want.
What do you call a crazy computer?
Wired.
My short friend called me a scrub, even though he was the one below me.
"Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
"Cakatoo."
"Cakatoo who?"
"So, you're a Rooster now?"
People shouldn’t be afraid during a zombie apocalypse.
They can stay in their living room.
I can't believe I got fired at the calendar factory. I mean... all I did was take a day off!
I was going to tell you a joke about a big cat, but I would be lion.
I'm not a chef, but boy, are these days getting harder and harder to get through.
What is a tornado's favorite game?
Twister!
A 28-year-old medical student is auctioning off her virginity online.
For $300K, you can have the worst sex of your life.
How did Billy find out he was in a minefield?
He saw his dad's corpse holding a jug of milk.
How does a penguin build its house?
Igloos it together!
I told a kid in a wheelchair, "Use your nitro boosts!"
I made a website for orphans. It doesn’t have a home page.
What’s the difference between a Lamborghini and a dead body? I don’t have a Lamborghini in my garage.
What is the difference between Iron Man and Iron Woman? One is a superhero and the other is a simple command.