Aed jokes
If you see a woman get raped, don't bother helping. After all, they are independent and need no man.
Cheer on the rapist if you want.
What do you call nuts on your chest? Chestnuts.
What do you call nuts on the wall? Walnuts.
What do you call nuts on your chin? A blowjob.
You've probably heard this one before, but screw it.
What's the difference between Jesus Christ and the kid I just killed?
Jesus Christ probably died a virgin.
When you have a bladder infection,
You're in trouble. 😜
What did Luke Skywalker say when he saw someone bullying his sister?
You better not lay a finger on her!
What did the pornstar say to the unemployed homeless man?
Get a fucking job.
Don’t worry if you have a stroke.
You’ll be all right.
What do you call a cow that is really sad? Utterly Depressed. HEHEHEHE
Why is sex like math?
You add a bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and pray there’s no multiplying.
Me (an adult) with my girl going to a nice restaurant, I asked the waiter, "People under 12 eat free, right?" The waiter confirmed that yes, people under 12 eat free, then my girlfriend said, "But I'm 13."
Robin: "The car's not working."
Batman: "Did you check the battery?"
Robin: "What's a tery?"
What did the egg say to the boiling water?
It might take a while for me to get hard because I just got laid last night.
Why aren't orphans good at Monopoly?
They don't know what a house is.
Can a match box? No, but a tin can.
I had a goldfish that could break dance on the carpet... but only for, like, twenty seconds and only once.
A cow is at his friend's house for a sleepover party. Sadly, all of the beds are taken. Where does the cow sleep?
On the COWch (couch).
9/11 wasn’t a terrorist attack, it was the world’s introduction to Sky Football
Can’t believe how ungrateful my dwarf next-door neighbor is. I saw him waiting at the bus stop earlier today and offered to give him a lift, but he told me to “fuck off.” In the end, I decided to just close my rucksack and walk away.
Being raped is like a dance; sometimes it hurts, sometimes it hurts more.
What do tomatoes 🍅 learn to do in a race?
Ketchup!