Aed jokes
I went to a depressed person and said, "Do you wanna hang with me?"
"So I asked a genie if he could grant me this wish. I wished to be like Michael Jackson. The next day, I was in a playground full of little kids."
Why did the chicken cross the road to get to the gay man's house?
Knock knock, it's the gay man. There's a chicken at my house.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple tree?
Apples get picked.
What happens when a black person gets in a car? The check oil light turns on.
Man: Okay, tell me a joke without the expense of anyone's feelings.
Me: Okay, so an Asian...
Someone threatened to break into my house, but I am in a wheelchair. I said sure, and I moved everything upstairs and sat on the stairs so he couldn’t steal anything.
Please folks, you can hit the thumbs up button on the ones you like. There is no need to repost.
Anyways,
Knock knock Who's there? Can I come in? Can I come in who? Can I Come In You!?
More often than not, I will cry when I masturbate. Some nights I'm a real tear jerker!
But on the nights and I smoke a lil pot and then masturbate, my dad ends up bugging me because I am a weed wacker.
How do you keep a dog from humping your leg? Pick him up and suck his dick.
How does Popeye keep his manly part from rusting? He sticks it in Olive Oil.
Snow White and the seven dwarfs are in the the tub feeling "HAPPY". Happy got out now they are fucking "GRUMPY".
What's worse than waking up and finding a "Penis" drawn on your forehead? Finding out it was "Traced".
If I had a rooster and you had a donkey and your donkey ate my rooster what would you have? 3 feet of my cock up your ass.
Did you know Batman was actually Black? Yeah he couldn't go a night with out Robyn!
Did you hear Gods Word Of The Day? Its Legs! Now lets go out and spread them.
What do you call a Mexican woman with no legs? Cunt-sway-low
Whats worse than sucking 25 oysters out of your Grandmas Pussy? Realizing you only put in 15.
What cigarettes does Churchill's wife like to smoke?
A blue Winston.
I gave a deaf kid air pods for his birthday.
What is 3 feet tall and sits at the bottom of children's beds?
A: Garry Glitter's boots.
Your forehead is like a line, it just keeps going.
"Hey, is that a peach?"
*gets slapped on the butt*
"Noted."
If I don't find a reason to live soon, my ceiling fan isn't the only thing that's gonna be hanging from my ceiling.
ok this isn't a joke but it's funny.
Roses are red, nuts are brown, Skirts go up, pants go down. Body to body, skin to skin, when it's stiff, stick it in. It goes in dry, comes out wet, the longer it's in, the stronger it gets. It comes out dripping and starts to sag, It's not what you think, it's a lipton tea bag.
Get your mind out of the gutter.
Q: What did the ocean say to the other ocean?
A: Nothing, they just waved! 🙃
Q. How does a feminist stop a rapist?
A. By using her equal strength.
How did the guys with Down syndrome split the dinner bill? They all made a down payment.
A man has been dating a girl forever. He finally says, "I love you." The girl says, "Aww, thanks." The man looks at her, "Are you not gonna say it back?" The girl says, "No, I can’t."
You're the type of person to play "Girl on Fire" during a funeral.