Aed jokes
Once there was a man. A man who had a butt.
Once he was at this job interview and he was going to get the job, but just before the boss was going to hire him, he farted. It was a really bad one. It was 47 minutes long and so loud the windows rattled. When it was over, the man screamed and jumped out the window.
He didn't get the job.
Why did the butt let out a fart?
Answer: To wipe out humanity!
How much wood can a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? If you woodchuck on the world with that, you have a really deep in, and he says goodbye. When he says goodbye, you're like, "if you."
Man: I'm here for the job interview.
Employer: Oh good, good. Sit down. We don't get many people for the interviews.
Man: Just anywhere?
Employer: Yeah, make yourself comfortable. Jackson, right?
Man: Yeah, that's me.
(Shakes hands and sits back down)
Employer: So what makes you eligible for the job, Jackson?
Man: Well, I'm really good at capturing the perfect shot and angle. It really takes dedication to do this type of job. Concentration and willpower, sir.
Employer: I like you already, you're hired!
Man: Wow, thanks, sir. I know I won't do you wrong. I'll work hard for this job!
Employer: You start now! Your first person is a man named John F Kennedy.
Man: What? You want me to just take pictures of him during the parade?
Employer: No.
Man: This... This is a photography job, right?
Employer: No... this is a job employment for man hunting.
Why do orphans live on the street?
They don't have parents to put a roof over their head.
My friends were the pilots on 9/11, they told me, "Bro, chill, it's just a prank!"
It would just be easier to be a gay guy, instead of a gender-fluid bisexual.
OWWWWWWWWWWW I JUST GOT A CUT ON MY BUTT. Oh wait, that’s always been there.
Ayo Lucas, a sussy baka!
An emo kid walked to me holding a rope, and asked: "Do you want to join my family tree?"
A: She looks good when she opens her hair. 😮
B: You will look good when you open your wallet. 👛
Who can drink 20 liters of fuel without dying? A jerrycan.
What did the mom tell her son when he asked for a bowl of cereal? "Sorry your dad wasn't came back with the milk yet."
you look like a dumb crab. When everyone sees you, the world will end.
Yo mama's such a milf, she deserves a tongue punch in the fart box.
I went to a depressed person and said, "Do you wanna hang with me?"
"So I asked a genie if he could grant me this wish. I wished to be like Michael Jackson. The next day, I was in a playground full of little kids."
Why did the chicken cross the road to get to the gay man's house?
Knock knock, it's the gay man. There's a chicken at my house.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple tree?
Apples get picked.
What happens when a black person gets in a car? The check oil light turns on.