Aed jokes
What’s yellow and can’t swim? A bus full of children.
How many people can you fit in a car?
6 - 3 in the back, 2 in the front, and my nan in the ashtray.
What's the difference between a bad joke and an actually bad joke?
An actually bad joke is not funny, like this one!
What does a pedophile and a light switch have in common?
They both get turned on by children.
A computer usually has a HARD drive. LESSON. No wonder they remember things.
What do you say to a ugly girl who claims to have been raped?
“Are you sure you didn’t rape him?”
I hope death is a woman. That way, she'll never come for me.
Yesterday, a guy threw a liter of milk at me.
How dairy!
What do you call a winter time contact?
A Santa Claus.
Bro, imagine shooting a school for autistic people.
When I was very young...
My classmates played a game called kiss chase. Some were really good at catching the girls and then kissing them.
They are rapists now.
What is the best part of a turkey? The drumstick!
How do you fit 100 rape victims inside a Mini Cooper?
In the ashtray.
What do you call an autistic person with a driver's license?
A LETHAL WEAPON!
What kind of nuts come in cans?
Creamed a-corn.
What do squirrels eat at the fair? A-corn dog.
A grasshopper jumps into a bar.
The bartender says, "We've got a drink named after you."
The grasshopper says, "Seriously? Why would you name a drink Callum?"
Where do nuts go for a quick energy boost? The nearest Shell station.
What’s a nut’s favorite scary movie?
The Creature from the Black Legume.
What is a cowboy’s favorite tree?
A horse chestnut tree.