Aed jokes
What did MLK Jr. say when he spent the night on the internet?
"Last night I had a meme."
Girls' dreams: OMG, my crush kissed me!
Boys' dreams: I just got a dub, bro!
What is cold and alone?
An orphan's parent.
Your hairline and your forehead must have a lot in common because they go waaaaaaaayyy back!
Which falls faster, a feather or an emo?
A feather, because the emos are always hanging in.
A donut and depression are the same. Both have nothing in the middle, and the other is nothing is left if you leave it for too long.
If someone's debating the speed of light and a drunk Russian, the Russian would take speed to grab a falling wallet.
Q: Why can kids relate to dogs?
A: They are noticed for 13 years, then left for no one to touch again.
What is old, cold, and alone?
An orphan's parents.
It cost me $100 to ride a taxi over your belly, it was that big!
Why do orphans have no sense of humor?
I guess they've never heard a dad joke.
Why can't orphans fail a test?
Because the teacher is gonna ask their parents to sign it.
Me: Knock, knock.
Another person (OP): OP: Who's there? Me: Hatch. OP: Hatch who? Me: Bless you =) OP: But I didn't sneeze. Me: You just don't get a joke, do you?
My wife told me I could never, ever build a car out of spaghetti. You should have seen the look on her face when I drove pasta!
I’m becoming a litter bit more zebra everyday.
What do you call a man with no shins? Tony.
Jesus takes his disciples to a bar.
"13 pints of water, please," he says to the barman.
"Oh, fuck, not you again," the barman replies.
"You boys are about to see something real special," says Jesus.
I don't think I could ever become a beggar. I really don't like change.
What should I write a joke about? Name the subject, and I’ll make a joke about it.
In honor of Michael Jackson, Vienna Beef, as well as other establishments, are introducing the Jackson dog. It's a 50 year old sausage between two 7 year old buns, with everything on it.