Abuse jokes
What's the difference between a Catholic Priest and a pedophile?
One is Catholic.
What's better than sex with your 12 year old sister?
Rolling her over and pretending it's your 10 year old brother.
What do you say to a pedophile at the beach?
Get out of my son!
Have you heard about the pedophile who was guilty of robbery?
He took a girl's innocence.
If you're ever bored, rape an orphan. What are they gonna do, tell their parents?
What did the pedophile say to the kids?
"FUCK!"
What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?
Nothing, you haven't told her twice.
Cindy goes up to her dad and says: "Daddy, can I have $100 for a new dress?"
Her dad almost gags and says: "$100! You're only 12, what do you want with such an expensive dress?"
Cindy says: "Well daddy, I'll look really pretty in it and I promise to look after it ..."
Dad gives in and says: "OK, give me a head-job then".
He flops it out and Cindy just get the end in her mouth and goes: "Eeee-yooo - that taste's like shit!"
Dad goes: "Well, your brother wanted to borrow the car this afternoon ..."
Random person: Imma smack you so hard your skin pigment changes!
Me: Who the hell do you think you are? Michael Jackson’s dad?
What's the difference between a PC and a 6 year old? I don't have to clean out my PC.
What did Michael Jackson say to the little boy?
"Shhhhhhh, this might hurt a little."
A police officer pulls over two Catholic priests. He says he's looking for two child molesters.
The Catholic priests look at each other: "We'll do it!"
Rape jokes aren’t funny. People like me that are actually victims of rape are triggered by them.
You ever hear of a reverse exorcism?
It's where the devil tells the priest to get out of the child.
Why can't religious women be raped? Because they are taught to never say no!
A young boy is stood on the top of a cliff crying. A priest approaches and says, "Why are you crying my son?" "My parents just crashed the car off the cliff and died." "It's just not your day today is it?" Said the priest, unbuttoning his flies.
What’s the difference between a doctor and a pedophile?
The doctor doesn’t enjoy giving physicals.
If her age is on the clock, she gets the cock.
I like my girls how I like my wine, 12 years locked in the basement.
Why is the Catholic church in favor of condoms now?
It's now getting harder to hide DNA evidence.