What’s red, nine inches long, and makes my girlfriend cry every time she sees it?
Her abortion.
I don't get why people don't like my abortion jokes. Do they have a stick up their ass? Wait, that's the other hole.
Q: Name a murderer?
Aborted fetus: My mum.
My gf told me she was pregnant. So I punched her in the stomach.
She asked me "Why the hell did you do that?!?!?" "I wanted to let you know I'm pro abortion."
Are you a school? Cause i wanna shoot some kids inside of you
Why did the failed abortion climb up the woman’s leg?
It was homesick.
Abortion is bad
What is jay
Phat
Ahem... if somebody you don't like, or somebody random just calls you in general,
answer the phone with this:
"Hello, thank you for choosing Mama's Pizzeria/Abortion Clinic, your loss is our sauce, how may I help you?"
or
"Hello, this is David's Orphanage, you make them, we take them, how may I help you?"
Some people's reactions are priceless, and then they wonder about your mental health.
Why do more women than men oppose abortion? Because they prefer not to get raped.
So, I was f**king my daughter the other night, and I don’t know what was funnier: the looks on my wife’s face when she walked in on me or the fact that the abortion clinic let me keep her.
Where is the worst place to lock your keys in your car?
The anti-abortion clinic because you have to go back in and ask for a coat hanger.
Why do more men than women support abortion? So they can keep raping women and the victims will just abort their kids to not have to relive the experience!
Abortion is wrong because God wanted the baby to be alive.
Miscarriages are okay because God did not want the baby to be alive.
What's the motto for a pizza place that's also an abortion clinic: Your loss is our sauce.
Men play video games to let their inner child out, while women do abortions.
My abortion.
Eat my butt.
What is the difference between a feminist and a gorilla?
At least gorillas don't abort their own.
Knock knock.
Who is there?
Cows go.
Cows go who?
No, cows go moooooooooooo, not whooooooooooooooooooooo!
