Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

What is the difference between a priest and a doctor?

The doctor doesn't like to give physicals.

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    • Little Johnny was eating dinner with his family. His mother went around the table and asked, "Mark, what would you like to eat?" Mark said, "I'd like some fucking potatoes." *SMACK*! Mother slapped Mark. She then asked Suzie, "What would you like to eat?" "Well, I'd like some fucking potatoes," said Suzie. *SMAACK*! She slapped Suzie. "Okay, Johnny, what would you like to eat?" "Well.... I sure as hell don't want no fucking potatoes."

    Husband: "I think I might take a picture of your breasts and frame it."

    Wife: "I think I'll take a picture of your penis and enlarge it."

    What's a pedophile's favorite cooking ingredient?...... Fresh meat.

    What do Michael Jackson and an Xbox have in common? Firstly, they both went from black to white, and secondly, they both get turned on by kids.

    Your Momma's so fat, the recursive function calculating her mass causes a stack overflow.

    Friend 1: Eyyy gurl

    Me: Hey! (Fake smile)

    Friend 2: Hey g-guys what 'bout we play would you rather?

    6 hours later

    Friend 2: So (name) would u rather? 1. "Hang" out with me Or 2. "Jump" 1 times?

    Me...e-eh?...Why not both????? We could just "Jump" while "Hanging" out right?

    How are shark eggs and your mom the same? They're both the biggest thing ever laid.

    Why are there only 363 days in an orphan's calendar? They don't have Father's or Mother's Day.

    Yo mama so dumb, she tried to put m&m's in alphabetical order.