Worst Jokes Ever

What does iCloud eat for lunch?

Your documents.

Screw you, ableists!

Dyslexic man walks into a bra.

What happens when premenstrual Raggedy Ann gets with the Pillsbury Dough Boy?

A red headed bitch with a yeast infection.

Your face was so ugly, you got adopted by a poop!

What do starving kids call Venetian blinds?

Bunk beds.

Why did the orphan have an iPhone X? Because it didn't have the home button.

Dad: You're adopted.

Son: Where are my real parents?

Dad: >:D They are dead, now come to their grave and sleep there.

My German girlfriend likes to rate our sex between 1-10.

Last night we tried anal, she kept shouting "9"!

That’s the best I’ve done so far.

What did the toilet paper say to the other toilet paper?

"Hey, check me out! I'm on a roll!" 😂😂🤭🤭

Whenever my grandparents apologize, I say "forgive and forget". They are really obedient.

My girlfriend accused me of cheating, and I said to her, "You're starting to sound like my wife."

If 80% of all suicides in the UK are males, and women want equality, then maybe they should just kill themselves.

Why do you have to wipe yourself with toilet paper? Because bugs can crawl, eat your poop, and drink your pee!

Wife: Hi babe. Husband: Hey. Wife: Do you wanna? Husband: YES! Wife: Ok, make sure you have a towel to go to the beach. Husband: WHAT? You mean go to the beach? Wife: Yes, what did you think I meant? Husband: Oh, nothing, bye. Wife: Bye, see you there.

Why did the egg fall off the motorbike?

He was shite.

What did the expired butter do once it had expired?

It did an expire.

Part 1: Two men were walking down the way when the third one came.

Part 2: Two men were walking down the way when the third one came.

Part 3: Two men were walking down the way when the third one came.

Part 4: Guess what... two men were walking down the way when the second one fell in the sewers and died... The first one was lonely.

What do a school shooter and a person with gum have in common?

One's the pull it out everyone wants to be their friend.

What did jptheflip win while playing this server?

Craft.