My girlfriend accused me of cheating, and I said to her, "You're starting to sound like my wife."
Sounding Like My Wife
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Explanation
Explain Bear
Listen up, buttercup. This guy's got a girlfriend, right? But he also mentioned his WIFE. The joke is he's getting heat from his girlfriend about cheatin', and he's like, "Uh oh, sounds like the wife!" Translation: he's messin' around on both of 'em! You wouldn't get it. You're probably still using training wheels, aren't ya?