Worst Jokes Ever

My grandad was shocked to learn that lightning can strike in the same place twice.

Shut the f*** up, I am an orphan!

One of my friends named Jill had a drug overdose.

She didn’t have any of that drug after that. For the rest of her life, she acted very high. When she died, it was because of natural causes, not the drug. So this proves that a lethal dose is also a life time supply.

In jail, why is the white guy scarier than the black guy? Because the white guy actually did something.

Why was 10 afraid?

He was in the middle of 9/11.

5 knock knock jokes from best to corny.

1. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Needle. Needle who? Needle little help getting in the door.

2. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Scold. Scold who? Scold outside, let me in!

3. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Mikey. Mikey who? Mikey isn't working, can you let me in?

4. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Says. Says who? Says me, that's who!

5. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Voodoo. Voodoo who? Voodoo you think you are, asking all these questions?

What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?

Apples get picked.

Kyler, go on this one.

Why are orphans different from apples?

Apples get picked.

I would like to tell you the name of a song I showed my friend who was on LSD. "I See a Dreamer."

Um, please do not swear, there is no need. Could you maybe just find clean jokes?

What is the most annoying thing your parents say to you, and what is the dumbest thing someone can say that annoys you?

The most annoying thing your parents can say: "Finish your dinner, there are starving kids in Africa!" No, you can't have any dessert until you finish your dinner. (See how annoying that is!)

The dumbest thing someone can say that annoys you: "Why is your name Crayla? Why is your last name Goldburg? Is it like a gold bird!" (That is really annoying if you ask me!)

Thanks for reading this...bye!

Someone complimented me on my driving last week. They left a note saying, "Parking Fine!"

I was at a concert in the front row, and I shouted something to the band's guitarist. He took it the wrong way and responded: "I'm going to go down there and hit you with my guitar!"

And I replied: "Is that a death fret?"

I have kleptomania. But when it gets bad, I take something for it.

I went out to buy some camouflage shirts the other day. Couldn't find any.

Overall, I'd say my career as a photographer has been a bit of a blur.

It's tricky when you're both a moth and a sea captain in charge of a ship, but up ahead, you see a lighthouse.

So fat you're a scale said, "Fat ass."

People at school thought I had special powers. It was something called "Constant supervision."