Why do a pedophile love Halloween?
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Why do a pedophile love Halloween?
Free delivery.
Danny Devito looks like one of those men with a short, yet thick penis.
How do you get rid of butterflies in your stomach?
Stop eating caterpillars.
What do you get when you cross a rooster with a small dog?
Voicemailing.
Chuck Norris is so immortal, even he killed Death.
When you’re trying to attract a partner, it’s important to project the qualities you desire. Shit, have I had to suck a lot of cock lately!?
Why did Helen Keller have a yellow leg?
Her dog was blind, too.
Chuck Norris used to be an orphan.
Because some families were too scared of his bravery to adopt him.
Dark humor jokes are like kids with cancer.
They never get old.
Sad to think about legend O.G. Mudbone being no longer with us.
I’m only curious how they closed his casket.
So this one time I saw Sally trying to get up after she fell off the swing, and I helped her up and she said "Thank you," and I said, "You're welcome." The next day I saw her legs and someone said, "I would not do that," and I said, "Whatever." I tapped Sally, and the top halve fell. I said, "WHAT HAPPENED TO SALLY?" And someone said she went in a minefield.
What do gum and guns have in common?
When you pull one out, everyone wants to be your friend all of a sudden.
I used to have a skeleton of jokes, now my supply is bone dry. Guess I wasn’t that femurous.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Pizza.
Pizza who?
Never mind, it was so cheesy.
What did the mommy cow say to the baby cow?
It's pasture your bedtime.
What is the difference between a nerd and leafyishere?
One is fun to laugh at, bully, and roast, and the other is just a nerd.
What games do monks play a lot?
Among Us.
Friend: Want to play Fall Guys?
Friend 2: Yup.
Friend: Ok, so let me ju- wait, where are you going?
Friend 2: I'm gonna jump off.
Friend: Why?
Friend 2: We are playing Fall Guys, right?
What's grey and can't fly? A parking lot.