Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

A handicapped person and an orphan get into a fight. The orphan says, "At least I have two functional legs." The handicapped person says, "At least I have two functional parents."

A girl asked her mom, "Why is my name Walmart?"

Her dad replied and said, "Because that’s where you were made."

Say this to someone who is fat that you don't like (make sure he's a virgin):

"You're so fat you can sell shaaade!! That's why you're a virgin and you masturbaaate!!! Yeah, I've see you, touching your 1 centimetre and if you have a gf she's is a cheater!!"

Make sure to say "shaaade" not "shade". And say "maturbaaate" (also try to say a D not a T in maturbaaate) not "masturbate".

Don't you find it ironic that Kobe Bryant bounced his helicopter off the ground like a basketball?

My wife said, "Why oh why have you ordered carpet, our house is lovely?"

Thankfully the carpet was put to good use in the end, no more stupid comments coming from a rolled up Emily in the bottom of the ocean!

My wife saw me hit the best drive yesterday with my golf clubs.

I must have drove that chihuahua 300 yards.

Your forehead's so big, when you were being born, the doctors thought you had no face.

If I don't get a bf by the end of this month, Christmas lights won't be the only thing hanging from the roof.