Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

Little Johnny is watching his dad shave one morning, and his dad was making a lot of mistakes. Suddenly, his dad screams, "Bitches and asses!" Johnny asks what it meant, and his dad replied, "Aunts and uncles." Oh.

Next thing he hears is, “Dicks and pussies!” Johnny asks, "What's that mean?" To which his dad replied, "Uh, coats and hats." Oh. Next thing he knows, he sees his dad jumping around the bathroom yelling, "Fucking, fuck, fuck, FUCK!" "What does that mean, Dad?" And his dad yells, "Cut Johnny, it means cut!!!" Oh.

Next week is Thanksgiving, and the doorbell rings. Johnny answers it and says, "Hey, bitches and asses, hang your dicks and pussies here, Dad's in the kitchen fucking the turkey."

An orphan asked if they could move into my house yesterday. I said, "Don't you have a family?"

Man 1: Why don’t we just put all the debt in the world on one man, then kill him?

Man 2: We tried that once. It started a cult.

Yeah, I stopped joking about 9/11. My jokes usually just ended up crashing and burning.

Why don't a gun and an orphan have anything in common? The gun is actually useful.

In Africa, it doesn't matter if you're gay, straight, or bisexual.

At the end of the day, it's night.