Worst Jokes Ever
I’ve been munching away on these new Tic Tacs recently and honestly, they are really good.
It’s a little strange how they came in a bottle labeled “Ibuprofen” though, and really, I’m starting to feel a little sick. The bottle’s almost empty though, so it’s time to get some more!
A disabled kid kept throwing up in class.
So I threw him out the window!
I love all races, even the bad ones.
Q. What's the difference between Trump and a Teletubby?
A. The Teletubby is a lot more coherent.
How was copper wire invented?
Two Jewish people fighting over a penny.
My great grandfather died in 9/11.
He was such a good pilot.
What’s the difference between chocolate and people?
You can’t buy people nowadays.
How is a priest like a wristwatch?
They both start at 12.
There is a Mexican, white guy, a Jew, and a Black man on top of the Empire State Building.
First, the Mexican and the Jew throw themselves off of the building saying, "This is for my people!"
Then the Black man is next up to jump and says, "This is for my people!"
And throws the White man off of the building.
House parties are like churches: there's always an underage kid getting fucked somewhere.
Why do vegans use blowjobs?
Because they can’t take real meat.
What do you call a prostitute in a wheelchair?
Hot wheels.
What do the initials CIA stand for?
Central Intelligence of A**holes.
My son was thrown out of school for letting a schoolgirl wank him off.
"That's the third school this year..." I said to my son, "... Maybe teaching isn't for you."
What’s the difference between a Jew and an American? The American makes it out of camp.
Why does 9/11 only get a day, but Pride gets an entire month?
Because pride is a bigger tragedy.
What website should you go to to look up LSD dealers?
TripAdvisor.com
What do you call a gay pride parade that was ran over?
Rainbow road.
What do you call lesbian sex during their period?
A blood transfusion.
Why are there no Walmarts in Palestine?
There are Targets everywhere.