I'M SOOOO SAD. (I have depression btw)
Worst Jokes Ever
Asian conversation:
Person 1: Ni hao, how's it going?
Person 2: Konnichiwa, what's up?
Person 1: I've bing chilling.
We see the movie Aladdin, and Abu steals more than Aladdin. I’m surprised that Abu hasn’t gotten killed yet.
I felt bad for a dog, and I looked to my left, and there was an orphan, and I said I will make you a website, and I said there won't be a homepage.
What is an orphan's favorite game?
Solitaire.
Why did the Indian man refuse to use deodorant? Because he wanted to smell like his natural habitat, the shitter.
Freddy, Bonnie, Cheka, Foxy, and Balloon Boy FNAF.
I pushed the kid in the wheelchair down the hill, but before I did, I set his wheels on fire and called him "hot wheels."
What's the difference between me and you?
I leave white stains in your mom's bed, and you leave white stains in my mom's bed!
What do your girlfriend and a pool have in common? They both cost a lot of money for the amount of time you’re inside them.
I yo yo-yo yo-yo yo-yo, yo-yo yo-yo you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you ha! Frick, fuck, gosh dang, you’re so big that you can’t ride. This is Builder.
What's the difference between sex and gender?
You can't have gender with your sister.
what's worse than a baby in a trash can? A baby in two trash cans.
Your mum is so fat that when you walk around her, you get lost.
What do you call a kid in a wheelchair with a gun? RG-XD
Yo, your hairline look like a cup.
Your hairline looks like a brick wall.
Silly joke! Where’s my natcho? You have it :excuse me it’s nacho cheese 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
What is an oven that you don’t own? Nacho oven.
31. During a recent password audit, it was found that a blonde was using the following password: "MickeyMinniePlutoHueyLouieDeweyDonaldGoofySacramento".
When asked why such a long password, she said she was told that it had to be at least 8 characters long and include at least one capital.
32. Two crows were in a field when they noticed a figure that looked like a man in the distance.
"See that over there? What is that?", says the first crow.
The second crow takes a long look, "That's a scarecrow. Looks authentic, doesn't it."
"How can you tell it's a scarecrow and not a person?", replies the first crow.
"Look at its hand. No cellphone", says the second crow.
33. Three friends stranded on a deserted island find a magic lamp. Inside it is a genie who agrees to grant each friend one wish.
“I want to go home,” says the first friend. The genie grants her wish.
“I want to go home, too,” says the second friend. And the genie sends him back home.
“I’m lonely,” says the third friend. “I sure wish my friends were back here.”
34. A cruise ship passes by a remote island, and all the passengers see a bearded man running around and waving his arms wildly.
“Captain,” one passenger asks, “who is that man over there?”
“I have no idea,” the captain says, “but he goes nuts every year when we pass him.”
35. After Sunday church, the priest would hand us each an orange and a big cookie. A little girl once lied and took two oranges, but the priest told her she mustn't lie because God is watching. Then, the girl took two cookies and lied about it. When asked why she had done that, she said because she thought that God was only watching oranges.
36. I was in my garden when I got the news that my father had fallen from a 20 feet ladder and was in the hospital. I rushed to the hospital expecting that my father had some major fractures, but he was alright except for some minor cuts. When I told him that it was a miracle, he disagreed and told me, "Son, I had just fallen from the first step of the ladder."
