Worst Jokes Ever
Why was Han Solo so suspicious when he put his penis inside Princess Leia for the first time?
Because it was Luke warm.
What's the difference between a gay and a freezer?
The freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.
Why couldn't a lifeguard save the hippie? -- Because he was too far out, man.
I wanted to learn how to drive a stick shift, but I couldn't find a manual.
An Irish guy walks out of a bar....
"Mom? Don't freak out, but I'm in the hospital."
"Aaron, you've been a doctor for over 8 years now, please stop starting every phone conversation we have with that."
There was a blackout in my neighborhood last night. The police told us to stay inside until they shot him.
What is black and sits at the top of the stairs? -- Steven Hawking after a house fire.
What does a cannibal call a wheelchair user? -- Meals on wheels.
What do you call disabled people in a hot tub? -- Vegetable soup.
Marriage is like a deck of cards.
In the beginning, all you need is two hearts and a diamond.
By the end, you wish you had a club and a spade.
How do you get a nun pregnant? -- Dress her up as an alter boy.
Yo mama so fat, when she walked by the TV, I missed three episodes.
Yo mama so fat, she got baptized at SeaWorld.
Yo mama so poor, the ducks throw bread at her.
Why is the lesbian lifestyle so expensive? -- They're always eating out.
... and they buy Rolexes for their neighbors, because they wanna watch.
Yo mama so fat, even Bob the Builder said, "We can't fix that!"
A programmer and his wife.
She says, "We're out of bread. Please go to the grocery store and buy one. And if they've got eggs, get six."
After a while, he's back with six loaves of bread.
The wife asks, "Why did you buy 6 loaves of bread?"
He replies, "They had eggs."
Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 20 people, then it exploded.
Yo mama is so ugly, when she goes to the photographer, he shoots himself.