Worst Jokes Ever
When Chuck Norris does push-ups, he's pushing the Earth down.
If you put a million monkeys at a million keyboards, one of them will eventually write a Java program.
The rest of them will write Perl programs.
Yo mama is so nasty, she buys sex toys at the second-hand shop.
Yo mama so fat, when she goes to the beach, the people shout, "Free Willy!"
A vampire walks into a bar and orders a cup of hot water. The bartender asks, "I thought you guys only drink blood?"
The vampire pulls out a used tampon and says, "I'm making tea."
Science flies you to the moon, but religion flies you into skyscrapers.
I think they are New York Jets fans and the Jets QB helped them... That's why one of them was off target.
Someone prank calls a general. The general hangs up and goes, "Kids these days have no respect for their elders. That's why I send them all to die."
I’m the type to join a cult unknowingly, but get too lazy to commit to it.
Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? Because he had no body to go with.
Did you know there's a place in Germany called Hanover?
Must be lots of drunks there.
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 was black.
Your forehead’s so big it got sponsored by GAP.
President Chumples memorialised Charlie Kirk by saying, "He had a real shot at being president."
That's not a joke. The fat fuck actually said that after pan face got shot.
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato.
A house has a crack. A guy covers it with Plaster of Paris.\n\nHouse: "Where the heck am I supposed to do my shit now?"
A manager asked a black employee to work overtime. The employee initially agreed until he was told it would be without pay.
The employee responded with, "You know what happened last time my family worked for free?"
"What happened?" said the manager.
"A civil war."
Back the halls with gasoline, la la la la la.
Light a match and watch it gleam, la la la la la.
My school is burnt into ashes, fa la la la la, la la la la.
What did the orphan say to the blind kid?\n\n"Hey, we both can't see our parents!"
Why can't two eggs tell jokes?
Because they will crack each other up!