Worst Jokes Ever
A cow is at his friend's house for a sleepover party. Sadly, all of the beds are taken. Where does the cow sleep?
On the COWch (couch).
YOUR MOM sucks my dick 24/7.
What's green then red all over and goes 100mph?
A frog in a blender.
A boy walks up to a girl and says, "I would tell you a joke about my dick, but it's too long." Then the girl says, "Yeah, I would tell you a joke about my pussy, but you'll never get it."
What do you call a baby that came out of their mother's womb? A virgin.
Today was a bad day. There was a man throwing butter and cheese at me, how dairy!
Why do orphans hate going to Costco? Because they need a parent to get samples.
A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods. The bear turns to the rabbit and asks, "Do you have any problems with shit sticking to your fur?" The rabbit says, "No." So the bear wipes his ass with the rabbit.
Q: How can you tell that a pedophile likes music?
A: He rapes D minor.
How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, because they beat the room for being dark, then arrest the room for being broke.
"Why do people call Americans excessive?"
"It was probably because of WWII."
"Oh, you mean the war where America responded to the destruction of several ships and a harbor and the deaths of a little over a thousand by completely flattening two cities and killing hundreds of thousands of people?"
They should add an eleventh commandment to the Bible:
Thou shalt not f... altar boys.
Patient: "I'm starting to forget things."
Doctor: "Since when have you had this condition?"
Patient: "What condition?"
I asked my uncle why he was living on the streets.
He said that he wasn't always on the streets, he used to have a job at these two towers. I asked him what happened, and he said two planes happened.
"Hippoty hoppity, women are property."
This page is shocking.
What's wrong with you people?
You gotta hand it to blind prostitutes.
Rules of Dark humor:
1. All subject matter can be used, nothing is off limits.
2. No saying "Me" or "My Life" as a joke. Nobody finds those funny. We want actual good and meaningful jokes.
3. Don't Repeat Previously Posted Jokes. If you are saying the same joke that the person right before you posted you are just begging for attention and nobody by any means likes that.
I will add more in the future and be frequent on this site.
- Sincerely, Zane
A child asks his teacher to go to the toilet.
"Before you go, recite the alphabet," the teacher says.
"a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o q r s t u v w x y z"
"Good, but where's the p?"
"Running down my leg."
Why did the little girl's ice cream melt?
She was on fire.