Worst Jokes Ever
What's a similarity between your best friend and a tree?
They both fall over when you hit them with an axe.
What do you call a candle in armor?
A knight light.
Doctor: "I have good news and I have worse news." Patient: "Well, what's the bad news?" Doctor: "You have one day left to live." Patient: "What news could possibly be worse?" Doctor: "I've been trying to contact you since yesterday!"
Man: "Is your body from McDonald's?"
Woman: "Why, because you're loving it?"
Man: "No, because it's fat and greasy."
Stephen Hawking died because he accidentally lost his bluetooth connection.
If drinking alcohol makes you an alcoholic, does drinking Fanta make you fantastic?
My dad posted a picture of his condom challenge fail to his social media - it was a picture of me.
Come on guys, please let's play Roblox. My name is xX_robloxGamer420Po_Xx.
What's worse than eating 5 raw oysters out of your grandmother's vagina?
Realizing you only put in 4.
What do you call a boomerang that never comes back?
Daddy.
You’re Russian when you go to the bathroom and Finnish when you come out. What are you in the bathroom?
European.
Why are retards good at basketball?
'Cause they dribble all the time!
I love Muslims, they are great at parties!
They have the best fireworks.
When you send her a dick pic, but then she sends you one right back...
What do you call a white man in court?
SUPERIOR!
Why do Down's kids blend in in geometry?
Their foreheads are angled.
If you are ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
Q: Why do Norwegian ships have bar codes on them?
A: So when they come into port they can Scan-Da-Navy-In!
A guy walks into a mosque... then blows up.
Justin: Hey.
Josh: Hey man.
Justin: Why only "man"?
Josh: It feels weird saying the r a c e y names.
Justin: I don't mind.
Josh: Okay, S L A V E.
Justin: Oh no, not T H A T one!